To ensure that our clients get the most out of their Family Mediation Brighton sessions, we have compiled the following guidance.
Pick a reliable arbitrator or mediator.
What is the mediator’s level of experience? If they have been accredited by the Family Mediation Brighton Council, you know that they meet the highest standards for qualifications. The accreditation procedure is time-consuming, and mediators are required to compile a comprehensive portfolio that demonstrates their skill and level of knowledge. Is it possible that a friend or your attorney may recommend a mediator for you? A significant number of Focus Mediation’s clients come to us on the recommendation of our earlier ones. Check over the website of your mediator and read any reviews they may have. Is there a lot of useful information on the website?
Put all of your questions, worries, and aspirations for the future down on paper.
During the Mediation Brighton Information and Assessment Meeting, often known as “MIAM,” the mediator will question you and your spouse about the problems that have arisen in your relationship. They determine whether or not Mediation Brighton is appropriate and then describe the process of mediation. It is also a time for you to examine whether or not you might benefit from participating in mediation. Keep an open mind. Although most individuals have a general understanding of what mediation entails, the MIAM frequently debunks some common misconceptions about the process. Put all of your questions, worries, and aspirations for the future down on paper. It’s easy to get carried away with your feelings, but keeping this in mind can help you stay focused on what really matters.
Coming to Terms with Finances
Be ready when you arrive. The mediator at the MIAM will supply you with a file that contains the documents you need to complete in order to appropriately reveal your assets, income, obligations, and pensions. This file will be given to you at the beginning of the Mediation Brighton process. You may expect the sessions to go more smoothly if you take the time to properly prepare. It is impossible to have productive conversations about how to handle the situation if you haven’t determined the worth of the family home or calculated the amount remaining on the mortgage. If you are having trouble completing the form, you should contact a friend or member of your family for assistance. Additionally, there are useful tutorials available online.
The Basic Procedures
The mediator does not make any choices throughout the Mediation Brighton process; rather, you and your spouse do. On the other hand, the mediator will handle the sessions and will ask you to agree to some ground rules that will apply throughout the session and maybe even outside of it as well. Communication based on mutual respect is a fundamental ground norm. It is essential to both listen and be heard in order for there to be forward movement. It is not your job to convince the mediator that you are right and your ex-spouse is wrong during the Mediation Brighton process. The parties involved in the mediation concentrate on the future rather than the unchangeable aspects of the past. This is especially relevant with regard to the distribution of the funds. The actions of the parties are rarely taken into consideration by the court, since its primary focus is on achieving justice and meeting the requirements of all parties involved to the best of its ability. Even if it’s difficult, you should try to listen to your ex. It’s possible that you may clear up misunderstandings that have occurred due to poor communication if you just listen to what’s being said.
Where exactly is the middle ground?
People go to court with the intention of winning, but the court does not search for a winner and a loser; rather, it works to satisfy both parties’ requirements using the resources that are at its disposal. When there is some space for negotiation, Mediation Brighton can be successful. If both parties insist on imposing their will on the other, the plan is certain to fail. The question now is, where can we find a compromise? Consider the things that are most important to you. In what areas are you able to afford to make compromises? Although this is an unsettling period, you should make an effort to view things from the perspective of the other person. Where will they make their home? They need to figure out a way to pay their debts. Inquire with your attorney about the recommendations they would make to your spouse. If they tell you that you should take 85% of the assets, would they have advised your husband (if they were their customer) that they should only receive 15%? It is essential to have guidance that is grounded in reality.
Maintain an Open Mind.
Investigate every potential avenue. Bring information about this to the sessions if you have been requested to investigate the possibility of getting a mortgage but you do not believe you will be able to make the monthly payments. You could conclude that doing so is a workable alternative. Even if it isn’t, we don’t have enough data to rule out the possibility just yet. Through meditation, you will be able to arrive at original and individualised solutions. What may work well for you and your family may not be appropriate for another family. We have a tendency to take up positions of superiority when we are afraid. On the other hand, if we are ready to investigate each and all possibilities, we could come up with some ideas that are viable.
Don’t be concerned if you are unable to communicate.
Customers frequently express concern that their lack of communication skills will prevent them from benefiting from Mediation Brighton. However, this is precisely the kind of situation in which mediation may be helpful. For there to be a negotiated settlement, the parties involved need to collaborate in order to discover answers to questions they think cannot be answered. The mediator is experienced in removing barriers to constructive conversation and opening the door for couples to take the next step. It’s true that the sessions are challenging, but the client gets a lot out of the work they put in. Quite frequently, we find that the sessions lead to an improvement in communication, which, in some instances, can lead to a sense of resolution and serenity.
Be patient and don’t give up.
The Mediation Brighton process is entirely voluntary but requires your full participation. The mediation will be unsuccessful if both parties continually threaten to walk out if they are unhappy with what is being stated. Be patient and accept that although the problems you are experiencing are new to you and frequently quite unpleasant, Mediation Brighton has been successful in resolving problems very similar to these many times in the past. You are following a road that has been travelled many times. Your mediator may be able to help you both reach a resolution, but in order for this to happen, you need to be committed to the process and avoid allowing yourself to focus an excessive amount of energy on things from the past that just can’t be altered. You don’t need to come to terms with what happened in the past; you just need to put it behind you and concentrate on finding solutions to the problems that are preventing you from having a better future.