Separating couples: coping with the stresses of cohabiting – Mediation Bath

We are living in unusual and difficult times. Covid-19 has significantly altered our position and function within our family, at home, and at work. We have had to modify our routines and the way we utilise our home and other areas. According to Family Mediation Bath studies such changes may result in stress, disagreement, uncertainty, and a sense of unease, which can be the final straw for a marriage.

The dissolution of a relationship might be among the most terrible situations a person can endure. During lockdown, the thought of having to self-isolate with a former spouse is likely to be very distressing. The lockout has intensified the pressure on cohabiting couples, particularly those whose relationships have reached an impasse. It is difficult to find a means to alleviate the stress because neither typical couple’s therapy nor just taking a break from each other is an option. Moreover, disagreements between parents may be detrimental to children, particularly when everyone lives under the same roof 24 hours a day. However, divorcing couples that want further assistance to avoid rising tensions have choices.

A partnership has broken down; should one file a divorce or wait till the lockdown is lifted?

An important piece of advice is to speak well and maintain composure. It will frequently be quite challenging, but it will be beneficial for everyone in the home. The lockdown might be a time to communicate to your partner in a calm manner why you believe your relationship has broken down. Family therapists and relationships counsellors are educated to support healthy communication and can still give their services online. In these unique times, obtaining help from a therapist or counsellor on an individual basis might be invaluable even if your partner refuses to participate. After hearing your partner’s perspective, you can decide whether to separate voluntarily during the lockdown or wait until the lockdown is lifted. If you decide to pursue your separation despite the existing conditions, you should be aware that legal assistance is accessible.

Even if social separation must be observed, the Family Courts are still operational, and the judicial system has been efficiently relocated to a remote platform. Mediation Bath Family attorneys operate remotely and are always accessible to assist clients in any manner necessary. Mediation Bath Mediators are also active, assisting couples across the nation through video link to reach agreements on child care arrangements, child support, and other practical concerns stemming from separation or divorce. Therefore, it is feasible to initiate divorce procedures during lockdown if desired. Checking the UK government’s webpage on how to seek a divorce in England and Wales is a smart way to familiarise yourself with the necessary processes.

If contact with your partner is impossible or likely to be nasty, nothing prevents you from organising your separation discretely and obtaining legal counsel and assistance remotely. If expressing your emotions causes you to fear for your safety, you can receive assistance by calling the Domestic Abuse Helpline.

Domestic logistics

If you decide to initiate divorce procedures during the lockdown, you will be forced to continue living with your spouse for some months. Finding alternate housing is rarely a simple task owing to a variety of variables, typically financial. This can generate significant stress and promote domestic disagreements. Communication, creating a pattern, and reaching an agreement on ground rules will be essential for avoiding or calming such situations. While living in the same household, your separation must be as organised and collaborative as feasible. You may begin by determining how you would share your home, i.e. who will use which rooms and when, and how you will divide household costs. It is recommended practise to put all decisions in writing. Although conflicts and disagreements are likely to persist, attempting to be organised and reasonable can be beneficial. You may also utilise this opportunity to further address your position, but couples with children should safeguard them as much as possible from any parental animosity.

Managing childcare

In certain instances, the increased tensions that lockdown might cause may force one parent‘s departure. Before opting to do so, both parents should carefully evaluate the physical, emotional, and financial implications of this action in the current atmosphere. Spending quality time with your children and taking the time to explain to them in a respectful, unbiased, and age-appropriate manner why you and your partner have reached this choice are crucial steps in mitigating the impact on your children. It is ideal to have this conversation with both parents and the children present, and to reassure the youngsters that they are not to blame for the divorce. The goal is for your children to comprehend the situation, comply with the new arrangements, and grasp the measures your family will take and how they will be affected. It may be important to obtain unbiased counsel on how to minimise the impact of separation on your children, and Mediation Bath mediators are available to assist parents in reaching co-parenting arrangements both during and after a lockup.

Conclusion

Separation is a difficult process for all parties concerned, and the present circumstance will certainly heighten and intensify the emotional impact. It is crucial to seek support if you require assistance, whether through legal help, counselling, mediation, or a trusted confidant. Communication with your ex-partner and others who are able to help you, even if it must occur by telephone, video connection, or texting, might make all the difference in managing tension during the lockdown in the case of the dissolution of a marriage or long-term partnership.

To learn more about how Solent Family Mediation can assist you, please contact us at 0238 161 1051.

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